New Beginnings

I am my own worst enemy.

I have a ton of things in my head to write about, but I don't even get started unless I have it all mapped out ahead of time. Why don't I just sit down and write? I think it has something to do with perfectionism, something about not even starting until I can finish well. I've always struggled with that, even in my daily chores. I've had to train myself to just do it even if it's only 15 minutes.

A new year excites me. It feels like a clean slate, a time of new beginnings. The last several months of last year were spent feeling defeated by the enemy. Life is just messy at times and, I felt like I was drowning in the confusion & chaos of it. Where was the victory that I, as a believer, was supposed to be living in?

A song I used to sing (in my days of 4-part harmony) keeps echoing through my memory:

Lift me up above the shadows, plant my feet on higher ground;
Lift me up above the clouds, Lord, where the pure sunshine is found.
Lift me up above my weakness, lift me up into Thy strength,
Lift me up above the shadows, till I stand with Thee at length.

Lift me up above the shadows, out of sorrow into joy;
Lift me up above my grief, Lord, give me gold for my alloy;
Then, when death must claim my spirit and the storms of life are past,
Lift me up above the shadows, till in heaven I stand at last.

That's where I want to stand...above the shadows. Life is still messy, but a sovereign God knows that. When I really realize how in control He is, and that I don't need to be, I live in sunshine even when there are shadows all around me.

Ahhhh...new beginnings...a clean heart...renewed fellowship with Jesus...strength in submission to God's authority.

(Man, I'd love to sing that song again in harmony with soprano, tenor & bass!!)